Yesterday when I posted “When God teaches hard lessons” my intention was to give others the freedom and safety to say I don’t have it all together, to not have to walk into church with a smile and joy when everything in you feels the crushing weight of the world. I wanted to step forward and give safety to others who also like us don’t have it all together. Let’s have coffee, let’s bake and cook together, let’s play games, let’s laugh, cry, and get angry together! Let’s form a safe place for those who are completely falling apart to come and be held or simply sat with in silence. For often times when we are in deep pain or life feels like it’s falling apart, we usually don’t want anyone to say anything. There are times I don’t share my pain simply because I don’t want christian answers, I just want to be loved and supported, I know the christian answers, it is that I am struggling to hold tightly to them. Silent love, silent support gives an amazing amount of courage, it also silently gives the one in pain safety to dive through the ashes and allow God to do his work.
In my post I was not by any means asking anyone to fix anything, that is God’s job alone. While he does often use his body to minister to others, I wanted more to share the incredible awesome work God is doing in our spiritual lives, work that will impact our kid’s, work that will impact how we live the rest of our lives. Sure, life is uncomfortable, but it’s uncomfortable because there are a lot of unknowns and unknowns are usually uncomfortable. But, I am confident God is working on the earthly side of things and at some point things will get ironed out. God cares and feeds the sparrows, he will care and feed us as well. I wanted to give encouragement to those who are struggling that even in struggle there is beauty and there is life beyond struggle.
One thing I have really wanted to learn and I’m getting a crash course is how to live life amongst chaos. To be able to still love those around me, to interact even in my pain without pulling away like I usually do. I pull away because I don’t want anyone to see me in all my nastiness, but it’s in my nastiness that I need encouragement and love the most. I am trying to let others love on me, to continue to fellowship even amongst pain. I have to tell you, I’m learning, I’m getting there, and my goodness it sure feels good. It has been even more encouraging because as I have tried to draw near to those around me, they have actually wanted me! They have encouraged me and they haven’t been repulsed by my pain, they haven’t walked away silently telling me I’m too much, to God be the glory they have come closer to me, they have surrounded me and my family, they have done as God intended the body to do! It’s amazing, truly amazing! May it be that I can do for others what others have done for us the last few months! May I be someone others can draw near to, to be prayed for, loved and accepted! Yes, may it be and may it be that they are drawn to the vine dresser, the savior Jesus. May they get their life source not from me, never from me, but may God use me as a tool to encourage and guide those in my life closer to the life giving vine!
Thank you to those who read my post, thank you for your prayers, thank you for your encouragement. Joy comes in the morning, truly it does, even when life is not all together. Trusting Jesus with tomorrow and being thankful for today! May you discover God’s peace, love, and joy, there is no greater place to be than next to the life giving vine!